The Wedding Series: Wedding Dress Shopping (part 2: The reckoning)
So we all remember the nightmare that was wedding dress shopping right?
If not, please allow yourself to scroll further down my posts until you find the first try-on session. It's worth looking at, I promise. There's some embarrassing pictures of me- you'll love it.
So allow me to fill you in on what's happened since then.
FIRSTLY, the wedding was scaled down a ton, basically we were turning into a 20 person small wedding/elopement. AND I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT TOO, IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU MEDDLING PARENTS.
Actually the fathers were super on board with it, the mothers tarred and feathered me so to say. (But in the nicest of ways, I promise.)
So once again the wedding scaled right back up and again Roger and I have been sentenced to live in the poor house for many years. (Joke's on you parents, now we can't afford to have your precious grand-children right away. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.)
With wedding dress shopping part one, I think you all saw that the dresses I was trying on were maaaaaaybe a bit out of the range in terms of the venue, the price, etc. And yes, I agree they were pretty much all terrible.
So allow me to spin you a tale:
So literally in the last week or so, we decided on a wedding day, we saw a venue, we booked a venue, we met with a caterer/baker, we picked out our flowers, we booked our rentals, we decided on decor, and somewhere in the mix of that we suddenly did the math and figured out I'd have to pick a dress in a matter of a week or 2 to have time to order it and have it tailored by the wedding.
It only occurred to me that the wedding is in 7 months. Now for those of you who have done a wedding before, you're all starting to panic with me. 7 MONTHS DOESN'T MEAN SHIT IN THE WEDDING WORLD APPARENTLY.
I have been yelled at no more than on several occasions for not having this planning done MONTHS ago.
Also, my apologies to anyone who has started freaking out because they've heard literally nothing about my wedding in a very long time- that is because nothing has happened til last week. MY BAD.
So the panic of wedding dress shopping finally set in and in a big, big way.
So I decided long ago I didn't want to have a dress made. It's too much lost in confusion, I didn't want to open myself up for miscommunication on something really important and frankly- I don't know shit about wedding dresses and fabrics. The dress maker would have probably murdered me before the process was over.
My only option from there is to hit the stores.
I went to a boutique style place first and honestly, it wasn't a bad experience at all. I popped in by myself, I tried on some stuff and ultimately it wasn't a bad day. It actually helped me narrow it down by a lot. Of course I sent pictures to my mom, of course she cried over one that I didn't like and insisted I should have bought it, and she needed to see it and all that. (Basically it was like the first time trying dresses on- something looked good on me, I hated it, everyone was pissed.)
Also, I did take pictures, but I accidentally deleted them so, whoops. Deal with it.
So then I popped to another shop a block over and there was literally nothing in there I liked. I didn't try a single thing on. It was all ball gown and puff-balls galore. It was all bad.
So I was out with my mom on another day and she basically twisted my arm into going to this place that we all know it's terribly over my budget. I kind of fretted about it a bit but when your mom tells you to do something- you kind of just have to do it. Like anyone in a good southern-German family- you learn to fear your mother.
Also, she had been spending days trying to convince me to do to San Francisco to find dresses and I THINK WE ALL KNOW THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN EXPENSIVE.
We must have looked around forever and I could see the appointment going downhill because frankly, I am very picky. I think most people who have gone clothes shopping with me know that by now. I will turn away things based on ANYTHING I don't like- which is why I went shopping by myself beforehand. If the sales-person hates me, I don't care. If it's my mom, I feel bad.
So I agreed to try on 2 dresses. One I actually cared about and one that was totally just for my mom to have that ~*~*~*ExPeRiEnCe~*~*~*.
As we can see, there is a small look of horror on my face by this point.
But honestly, this is what really happened and what saved the appointment:
So this is actually the second dress I put on. The first one, a completely different style I put on I actually hated at first- but when I went out into the natural light- it all of a sudden came into place. I had a feeling it might be a contender because I was sort of reluctant to take it off.
My mom and I couldn't figure out what it was about the first dress we didn't like, but there was something kind of off about it. Yes it was a less than traditional color and even a non-traditional style but it was the first time I felt something bridal and special and so it was a very confusing couple of minutes. It wasn't til I started playing with the straps that all of a sudden it was like, BOOM. Once I altered the straps a little it was like, precision perfect. Even with my slightly pudgy belly and arms, my disgusting hair, and the fact that I was sweating a little- I felt good about myself and my body.
And no one cried. Somehow my mother managed to keep it together, I got my bridal moment, and everything was pretty good.
But of course you don't stop at the first dress, and this is when the puff ball arrived.
My theme is kind of Southern Gothic- which is the bane of my family's existence right now because they want southern elegance/burlap and lace. And when I say, "Yeah but add black to it" they all kind of flipped out and spun off into space and their heads probably exploded.
So my mom pulled this one which is very traditional southern and very popular with the brides in my area.
So I'm sliding this 3 inch thick, completely boned, monstrosity on and I had a feeling this was going to be a problem. These are the kinds of dresses I look good in, great even. BUT while everyone is focused on how it looks, I'm sweating to death inside a sausage casing. Needless to say, this is not my favorite look. In fact, it's kind of a nightmare for me.
Preparing for a verbal rumble, I came out to the bridal floor, wearing a dress that honestly had no marks against it other than I just hated it.
And my mom laughed.
She straight up laughed at me.
And then I laughed, and she said, "I'm sorry, it's not that it looks bad. It just doesn't look like you at all."
And that was it. I took off that dress and that was the end of the puff-ball dresses. I have yet to try on another one, and I don't think I ever will (God willing.)
It's been about a week or so since that other dress and I'm still thinking about it. Every time I show someone pictures of it, they don't know what to think at first but they all come around to it once I tell them the full plan.
My mother in law cried though, which I'll take as a good sign.
So now the plan is to finally round the girls up and take them over there to get a final verdict but I'm 99% it's a winner.
WHICH IS WHY I CAN'T POST ANY MORE PICTURES, SORRY.
I don't want to ruin the surprise, trolls!
Umm, so advice time, I guess.
Don't get too caught up, try to enjoy the process.
Do whatever your mom says, unless she's telling you to buy a dress you don't like. I didn't have that problem exactly, but I did have people trying to push me into dresses I know I didn't like.
You're allowed to be picky. It's a very expensive wedding dress and it's going to be in all of your pictures. Try to find something you love and not something you can "deal with".
Searching for a dress is like finding a husband. I thought Roger was weird at first too, and I tried to find flaws but it turned out it was perfect for me despite it being "nontraditional".
Turns out weird and nontraditional are kind of my thing. Who would have known?
-SamanthaK
